It was the best of times, and the worst of times.

19 06 2009

Today is the last day for me here at Solid Source. The company that took me to Africa, and saw the grace that is there in the worst of conditions. The company where I learned the difference between raster and vector and how to use them. The place where I decided to come back to church and give it another go; the time where I met my just about to be wife, and people who I was able to produce three shows at the fox theatre for. I have been in a wonderful place and God has used this time for me to grow, spiritually and professionally. I know that I would not understand what I have found in Amy to be so amazing if I wasn’t in this stage of life. I have learned and taught myself so many things. I am all mixed up about leaving.

On one hand I am excited for the new experiences, and the end of some of the hassles I deal with here. I have seen a lot come and go, people loving and hating this place. I know we all both love and hate a lot of our jobs, even at the same time. But Solid Source was good to me and was very helpful in many ways. From the new car, new talents, and new places I have been. I have loved them all; I will miss this place and some of the people.

On the other hand, I am nervous; nervous that I could be making a mistake. I know I truly believe God is leading me away from Solid Source, you know there is a small thought that maybe you are dumb to do this 22 days before you get married. I am glad Amy and I had come to grips with what this means to leave here and find the next path for the next season in our life. But you know God brought her all the way from New York to be here in my life. I am sure he is going to lead my life in the new direction. This is the time I need to leave I cannot and will not allow us to start our life together in a position where I do not feel happy, challenged, or good about my work. She deserves me to be happy, challenged, and confident in my work.

So now I move on and look for other things, I have some leads and I definitely have the ability. I just keep praying and trusting that the next step will be the correct step.

I guess the one thing that SSR gave me, was the confidence to believe in myself, and confidence to know who I am and that God REALLY does love me.

So thank you God, for bringing this into my life, and thank you for giving me the courage to leave it behind and the ability to stand firm and walk away with my head held high.


This is my favorite day!

21 10 2008

Life is going so well, finally I have gotten over my addition to the election coverage and don’t really pay attention to all the rhectoric. Life seems to be coming together, there are some stresses, but my relationship with God is wonderful. My life with Amy is amazing, work is good taking more and more on and I am excited about my mission trip coming up. Sometimes I stop and think about life and how things in your life are important to you. For now! I see where God has brought me from and delivered me from and promising me for the future. I can honestly say that this is the best time of my life so far and today would ber the best of my life. Well until tomorrow probably. I never though how just being with a wonderful woman can make you feel like the man you were always told you were by others but didn’t believe it. I praise God for all these things in my life that are going so well and I cherish the wonderful times cause it won’t always be wonderful!

Mr. Stanley talking about the next President.

10 09 2008

Well these next 50+ days we are going to elect a new president. It is a wonderful expierence, and this election has truely been one to make the history books. I wrote a month or so ago about a series my church did called “letters to the next president” and i posted the letter i would like the next president to read. I have included in this post a video from my pastor talking that. So regardless what you stand for or who you want in the white house. Check this site out! Write a letter you cannot create something you want or something different without talking about it and letting it be known.

Sometimes I am embarassed to Be a Christian!

28 08 2008

So I have been looking around for a good topic to blog about for the past several days. Outside of the political world I haven’t had much to talk about. For some reason I don’t want to write a lot of political stuff. So I was just browsing some of the news sites I read from time to time. I came across a new item that is coming out soon called (are you ready for this) “Guitar Praise.” When I read this I thought it was a joke. Nope it isn’t a joke at all it is real. Guitar Hero with praise music for $100, hey I can plug into your trendy Mac as well.

Yes that is a knock off of Guitar Hero for us Christians. I mean what is more arrogant than the freakin Christian marketers just ripping off stuff, not making it new in anyway except adding some stupid Christian music. I know I know some of the music is good, but for the most part the corporate Christian music is worse than the Top 40 stations on the mainstream. Why do we feel we need to not be original, not think for ourselves to come up with good ideas. Not use a successful idea from someone else steal it and add the word God, Jesus, Church, or Praise to make it “Christian.” I wouldn’t be surprised if the Devil himself (Family Christian Stores) had a hand in creating this crap.

I mean we have so many problems as believers to not be thought of as arrogant, selective, judgmental, mean bastards by the world. Now we create this crap along with the “Christian” mints, “Christian” pot holders, “Christian” crack rock, and more. Just because you put a cross on something doesn’t make it “anointed” by God. It definitely doesn’t make it cool or awesome. Example Bible Man, Bible Man, Bible Man! These things makes us look like elitists, I know you should have an alternative to the violent themes of the “superheroes” on TV. You know what why not come up with something for your child, and not rely on the poor marketing of cheap toys with crosses on them so your child can be ridiculed by his peers. Wait you probably home school the poor child.

Look I don’t want you to think I don’t like things that are for the Lord, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Those things don’t try to look like, sound like, or pretend to be the “secular” thing.
Example, I like Todd Field’s music, now he doesn’t take non-Christian songs and changer the lyrics to make himself more appealing. No he writes what he wants or is lead to. That’s why I like him. Veggie Tales, I know it is for kids, but it was very original and it was well written. They both Todd Field’s and Veggie Tales are “Christian” things, but they are original and real. Not reformed like the potato head Christian products that just slap a cross on an item and double the price to sell in the “Christian” store. I mean you are loved more by God for shopping at the “Christian” it’s like showing up at church twice on Sundays. (though the crappy revelation movies are quite a riot, I mean if you absolutely nothing to do)

I have heard all the objections to what I have said. I know I might have offended you. I know. It’s just Jesus didn’t come to earth and hang out at the Jehovah Java all day with his Christian friends and go shopping at the LifeWay Christian Store for his music. No he was with the hookers, murderers, tax collectors, liars, adulterers, and more. In fact the people he had the worst taste in his mouth for was the people outside the temple like in John 2:12-25. So why do we feel the need to make ourselves separate from others with our trendy little “Christian” only stuff. When if we were original it would minister to people.

Beheaded Canada bus man

1 08 2008

I was reading a story this morning about a man who killed a young man on a bus. Actually removing his head, walking to the front of the bus and presenting it to the passengers. Who were then frightened. So I was interested in his story, it is sad the young man’s life was so tragically ended this way by a man he didn’t know and for no apparent reason. The story said that the murderer was emotionless and cold when he went to the front of the bus, as in he wasn’t mad, crazy, or any of the normal emotions you would think that would warrant a man do stab someone 16 times and cut off their head. It is a horrible story and the more you think about being present the more you would realize the crippling fear you would experience when that happened. While all the news people are talking about security and all that in the bus travel industry.

I am pondering what snapped in a persons mind like that?

How do something like that happen without a fit of rage?

How does human life then become so impersonal that you could snuff it out like that with as much reactions tying your shoes?

I bet a lot of people wonder why would God allow someone to do such a thing?

Or Why that kid, who was said to be funny and “bubbly?”

You would hear in church that things happen for a reason and God is weaving a tapestry and we cannot see the ultimate picture. That pain and suffering is a “megaphone of the cross” to steal Louie’s words. I am not going to answer that cause there are far more intelligent communicators who can explain that better than I can.

What I want to discuss, is how does a man or woman snap like that? Personally I notice when I do something difficult or tough the first few times it is hard. Then it gets easier! Had this man done this before? Another thought I have is God says he loves everyone, Does he really love this man?

The answer is yes, and this man still can be forgiven by the blood of the savior. He is one of the ones the church leaves out to dry, I dunno if it is cause some people don’t care for them to be loved since they showed no mercy or compassion for someone to cut off their head.

But we look at television and see a man named Jack Bauer cut off a man’s head to help solve the situation. Jack did this with no remorse or visible pain. Now I know it is television and it was the good guy doing something to bring down the bad guy. But on the show we would forget and even overlook this action by Jack Bauer. I know you are thinking, yeah this is a silly comparison. My point is that murder is murder and it is wrong. But like murder there are other things that are wrong and doesn’t make a person bad. We all have done things we wouldn’t want others to know about and would be shamed if they did. But actions don’t make our whole selves bad. I am not condoning or saying that the murderer is a good man I do not know him.

What I am saying is that this country has this “damn them to hell” attitude with people who commit crimes.

We have this “oh, I cannot believe they did that!” When you have thought about the same action! We say, “Eye for an eye, they killed a little boy they should be put to death.” Then they say they believe the bible and love Jesus. Not doubting that they love Jesus but, Jesus was the largest advocate for love, grace, mercy, and compassion EVER! He was with murders, prostitutes, thieves, and he loved them. He didn’t damn them to eternal suffering. He didn’t stone them for being a whore, even when he could have. He showed them love and compassion. Now the bible does say that there are consequences to wrong doing. (Gal 5)

How can we as a people and body of Christ sentence someone to death for their crimes we caught them doing?

How can the person who says they were appointed by God to lead the nation, send more people to death than any other leader?

I am not saying they should be set free, or they should work with our children of course not. What I am saying is that even the worst of the worst (Paul) can be changed in an instant by God. Even the man going out to slaughter a whole group of people for believing something can be stopped changed and go on to lead that group.

So let’s have some mercy let’s show people, “hey even though you messed up you are still lovable.”Cause Jesus did and God calls us to. I know you will say, “can you love a killer?” I want to answer yes, but the truth is through the Holy Spirit I know I can. Just because you have written someone or something off cause you think there is no hope. DON’T put God in the box! For He CAN change that man’s heart. And God may want to use you as the segway into his spirit.

So let’s pray for the persecuted and the persecutor that they both find their way to the Lord!


S#&$ man, this is awesome!

25 07 2008

Shit, for a lot of people this isn’t a word they give a “shit about. For me growing up in the church they always equated cursing with drug-use, pre-martial sex, smoking, and drinking. As a youth these things that were pressed upon me to abstain from because it makes your relationship with God not so good. Now as an adult, I quite often use that word. I look back on my youth and realize it was a good thing for the young people to be given rules and guidelines not as legalism or earning salvation. But more helping you, helping you keep margin at a younger age so that you will can try to stay away from things that can really hurt your life physically, mentally, and spiritually. I bring this up cause I have been hearting a lot from the past couple weeks about Christians and their mouths.
I think it is rather comical that most of society curses all the time with no real moral guilt or anything unless they are in front of an old lady, priest or you know what I mean. As a whole no one cares. The ones who do are the religious ones. The ones who say it is a terrible thing to say these things. Personally, I haven’t read in the bible or had a prophetic word spoken to me about the specific words I was using in my language. My take on this, I encourage you to read and find out for your self is not based from the bible directly (as I haven’t ever read anything about cursing or not cursing.) is that it is the intent of the words being said rather than the specific words at all.

Example 1. Let’s pretend someone said this to you, “Your are an ugly human being, your life makes me sad!”
‘That was very hurtful and it would make you feel terrible to hear that some anyone weather you knew them or cared about them or not.

Example 2 Here is something using a curse word, “Hey did you see Dark Knight, man it was the shit?”

Example 3 and another one “Hey man, this band fuckin rocks!”
Now on television both example 2 & 3 would have been bleeped out and edited. But the first sentence would be fine.

Moving on I understand that the “curse words” of our society do accentuate things and give them more power for the good or the bad. What I am saying in short is that; is it is NOT hypocritical for a believer to use any word in a positive manner. PERIOD they are words, the English language wasn’t invented till long long after Jesus and the bible.
Even still I hear from church leaders and such about how some other leaders said this curse word or that one. I think it is ridiculous, we should worry about the negative words being about the person who was using said curse word.

Jesus called us to love God with all our heart, mind and soul. As well as to love our neighbor as our self. I understand leading by example and the others argument about the limited vocabulary of the people who curse a lot. But sometimes you want to say what you want to say. Intent not that the word is what does the damage to someone else. It is the intent of your mouth that can start a forest fire not the word said.

So let me know what you think I mean I could be wrong, and I could be misguided.


We should all have a cease fire!

8 07 2008

I was watching Joyeux Noël last night. The premise of the movie was the front line of “The Great War” and the Scottish, French & Germans were a 100 yards from each other in the trenches on December 24, 1914. The was based on a true story from the war. The story is about how their was a cease fire for the night and the opposite sides “fraternized” and took part in a catholic mass intermingled with each other.

It was interesting the way the soldiers interacted with each other after that moment when the opposite side became personal and not just a thing. Anyways towards the end of the movie the Priest who conducted the mass was told to go pack to his parish by his cardinal. The cardinal saying he had done a terrible thing. Then the priest said, “I sincerely believe that our Lord Jesus Christ came to me in what was the most important Mass of my life. I tried to be true to his trust, and carry his message to all, whoever they may be.” The cardinal quickly responded, the soldiers who are replacing those who went astray with you. May our Lord Jesus Christ guide your steps back to the straight and narrow path.” Priest retorts, “Is that truly the path of our Lord?”. The cardinal moves on to another room, and leads a group of young soldiers in telling them that they are performing the will of Christ, that Christ is calling them to kill the Germans, misquoting scripture and then praying.

I am not trying to give the point of the movie away it is a wonderful movie I am trying to point out how a lot of us feel about God. How a lot of people who believe in Jesus. We tend to put our God in a box, we put him in our backpack thinking that since we are for it God is too. I am not saying that I am for or against communism or the actions of the German regime in the early 1900’s what I am saying that, we all are capable of the grace and salvation of Christ. That we all as believers believe very different political things. We are on all parts of the political spectrum. So I understand there is sin and the bible describes sin. But we all do sin and we all will continue to sin. So why are we leveraging God to hurt people who love the same God. Why do we want to hurt people because they may have had an abortion. Why do we want to hate people and make them feel unloved because they are Gay. Like Jesus says those who want to be first must be last.
I makes me sad when I see the church persecuting it’s own and especially sad when the church persecutes non believers. Sometimes it feels like the story I read in the old testament about the people building the tower to God and he cursed them with different languages and they couldn’t communicate to continue building so the structure came crashing down. We as a body are not communicating properly to ourselves. But the people on the outside looking can see that there is a problem and don’t want to come near.
I know sometimes it seems like I am beating a dead horse, but I am saying that why can’t Jesus love our enemies, I mean he called us to love them?

Why don’t we recognize that someone else’s sin isn’t worse than ours, we just don’t have those same problems, instead of hating them or hurting them let’s love them?

I don’t know maybe I am way off on this one!